Next Time

I’ve got to admit, the passing of Wayne Dyer earlier this week had me feeling a little sad. I’ve most of his books and loved what he had to say. I surely looked up to this man.

A few years back, I went with a friend to one of his talks when he came to Halifax. I would have liked to have gone to meet him after the show, but we didn’t. We left with me longing to have met him on a more personal level. Afterward, I promised myself if I ever got the chance again, I wasn’t going to let it pass. Even if it was just to say “Hi” and get a close up photo. My mind was made up. Next time, things would to be different.

See where that thinking got me?

There’s something to be said about seizing the moment and not letting opportunities pass because, seriously, we never know when our encounter with someone is going to be our last. I should have learned that lesson many years ago on the day my father died. I was at the house when he left to go to town and I don’t even think I took time to say goodbye. (The day was busy. He was just going in to town and I’d likely see him later that day. If not that day, the next.) He never made it home.

We put too much dependence of these “next times” in life, giving ourselves and easy out. (No problem… I’ll just do it next time!) While that thinking is fine and dandy so long as we get that “next time”, but what about the “next times” that never materialize? Think of all those missed opportunities.

So, I’m going to try and change this. If I have something on my mind to tell someone I’m not going wait until the “next time.” No more “next times” for me if it’s at all possible. From now on “next time” has been wiped from my vocabulary. I’m going to be a “this time” kind of gal. If I have an urge to meet someone, to say hello, or to stop and talk a few moments, even when I’m in a hurry, I’m going to do it. This may not work all the time, I mean, sometimes we do need these “next times” in our lives, but I can almost be sure that many of my “next times” won’t be filled with regret later on. That’s all I can do.

I hope you’ll join me on Wednesday when author/blogger Darlene Foster pops in for a visit to talk about why she writes for children. Darlene’s the author of the Amanda Adventure Series for young readers. Hope to see you next time. Oops there’s that “next time” again!

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7 Comments

  1. I so hear you. I really try to do things at the moment because you never know. It doesn´t always work out of course but it is good to practice “carpe diem” whenever possible. I too had much respect for Wayne Dyer but never had a chance to hear him speak, like you did.

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  2. I’m speechless! I’ve been so wrapped up in writing that I haven’t poked my head up for days. I had no idea Wayne had died. I had a suspicion he’d been sick. Probably from seeing him on PBS. He was ill for a time. Then he and his wife split. That shocked me. I just assumed someone like Wayne would always be contented and happy. The world has lost a wonderful human being and a wonderful inspirational speaker. I’ve read all of his books many times over.

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  3. My mom and several of my clients had the pleasure of attending Wayne’s events and meeting him. It’s so surreal when a celebrity passes away – they’re gone, but they’re not, you know what I mean?

    I completely agree with you about the “next time” mentality. My health hasn’t been the best this year and I constantly remind myself to stay in the moment, DO what I really need to do, stop talking the talk and walk the walk sorta thing, and stop holding out for that mythical “next time.” My Grandpa passed away on May 16th and, while I’m at peace with aging and dying, his death has affected me more than I would have imagined. He was my last living Grandpa; I was the first grandchild; I had kept putting off visiting my grandparents – they live in Kentucky, me in Ohio – thinking, oh, they’re not THAT old, there’s no rush. (It had been over two years!) Fortunately, as I thought back to that last visit, I remember getting suffocated by one of his big hugs – he’s 6′ 3″ and I’m 5′ 6″ – looking up at him and telling him, “I love you, Grandpa.” I feel pretty okay with that good-bye…

    Your post really resonated with me, Laura, thank you!

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    • Leah, I’m so sorry to hear that your health hasn’t been good. In fact, it upsets me quite a bit. I hope your health soon improves.

      We all put things off and it’s too bad that we do, but there’s also a point where we have to be gentle with ourselves and know that we all put things off. and you’re right, we seem to think that death only comes to older” people when in fact it can come to any of us at any time. Our relationships are precious and we need to remind ourselves of this from time to time.

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